This could be good for all sorts of time waste: a PHP version of Zork. Actually, judging from the leaflet in the mailbox (you did
open mailbox and
take leaflet, didn’t you?), it’s a port of Dungeon, the predecessor to Zork, but who’s splitting hairs? As long as it has grues, it’s all good.
See also my previous mini-post about an implementation of Zork (and other Infocom games) over AIM. Judging from the comment thread, the bots are still a-runnin’.