Day: November 13, 2002

I wasn’t going to post…

…until I got the new site set up. But I’ll be in training today and won’t have a chance to finish the setup, so a quick update.

I’m touched by the support I’ve gotten since posting Monday about the Black Dog. I wanted to assure all of you that this is nothing sudden or intensely scary. I’m reaching the realization that there are some things that it’s better to discuss and write down than not. And I’m discovering some things about myself that I never acknowledged before. I’m going to come out of this stronger and better and that’s the important thing.

And in the meantime it’s not raining here (yet) today, and I’m going to take that as the good sign that it is and get on with this day.
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Hanging in there

Regarding what I wrote last night: I think I need to stop blogging before bed. Not that I regret what I wrote, but it honestly sounds bleaker than I meant it to. It’s honestly raining today, and somehow that makes me feel better (though it also made me get up later).

I think some small portion of this is just loneliness. Knowing that others are dealing with similar issues does make it easier to sort through it.

I should run to work now. I’ve been promised comp leave, but I have a class tomorrow so I need to do my best to clear my plate today. Then maybe Thursday or Friday I can just lay about.

Oh, my new site is almost up and running. There are a few things left to sort out, but when all is done I’ll post here with the new address. I’m so excited. The new site looks like it will actually stay running in the middle of the day….

Back on the late night schedule

I haven’t been writing much lately. It’s a combination of a few things. When my site finally moves to a new home, I don’t want to have to recreate a lot of work.

I’ve had some things to write about. But some of them, like things at work, I’ve been reluctant to discuss. Others, like my depression, I’ve been struggling to understand well enough to write about. I don’t know that makes me feel better to know that others, including, apparently, Moxie (whose depression is discussed by Dawn), go through the same thing. For a while writing helped, but I’ve realized I’ve been writing around my thoughts and feelings, not getting them down.

Now it’s harder to write much of anything meaningful. I might take a few days off from blogging to work through some of this. Partly it’s work. My group made a big presentation today, but it’s too early to tell whether it went well or not. And through the rest of the week I’ll be wrapping ends up in this job and moving to a sister team in my organization. Some things should improve after I make the switch. Others will still be there. And I have to figure out how to work through them.

If you read my blog for things about the Mac, or scripting, or even food, you may want to watch those categories rather than the whole blog for a while why I figure things out. If you’re getting this stuff through the RSS feed, and you want to unsubscribe, I understand, but I hope you’ll stick around. If all goes well, things will get better here soon.
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