It’s hard to get into the holiday spirit when it’s 55° outside, somehow. What’s that? Didn’t you grow up in Newport News, Virginia, where it snowed maybe three holidays in the eighteen years you were there? Well, yes, alter ego italics, I did. But this is frickin’ Massachusetts. Last year it was already below freezing by Thanksgiving.
It’s hard to get into the holiday mood without the proper incentive. So, without further ado:
Deck us all with Boston Charlie,
Walla Walla, Wash., and Kalamazoo!
Nora’s freezin’ on the trolley
Swaller dollar cauliflower Alleygaroo!
Don’t we know archaic barrel
Lullaby Lilla Boy, Louisville Lou
Trolley Molly don’t love Harold,
Boola Boola Pensacoola hullabaloo!
Or something like that.